Now? Relieved. Earlier? [EFF!
Allow me to elucidate. This morning, my mother and I were in the process of making our breakfast, when I saw something moving in front of the window. Or rather, out of the runner of the sliding window. I soon realised what it was...
Why? Well, it was this...SNAKE!!!
My mother, who was busy filling the kettle, thought I was screaming because of something else, until my slightly-more rational brain centres engaged with my vocal cords to tell her what I was screaming about. Then, she screamed too.
The bloody thing got in through an air-hole in the sliding window that didn't have a cap on it, and was squirming around the kitchen. I beat on the kitchen bench to try and shoo it back out, while my mother decided to get a hammer and an axe, just in case. I am not kidding. She HATES snakes. And spiders. And interminable lectures on Doctor Who
She didn't use said implements, though.
We managed to scare the damned thing between a window pane and a window screen, and kept it there until the snake people picked it up.
The punchline? It was a juvenile green tree snake. And green tree snakes, funnily enough, are not only non-venomous (though given Australia's reputation for deadly snakes, it never hurts to be careful, and it may have been a baby brown snake, which is very [EFF!
]ing dangerous), but they defend themselves like skunks do.
Four minutes? That's ages! What if I get bored? I need a television, a couple of books. Anyone for chess? Bring me knitting.
-The Eighth Doctor, defiant in the face of death, in Doctor Who: The Night of the Doctor