A Name Fit for a Pope

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A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby KnightOfFewWords » Tue Mar 12, 2013 1:40 pm

And they're off! The irregularly scheduled but widely anticipated 'holy-pope-on-a-rope, better-elect-a-new-pope' contest is finally under way. A minor point of interest is always the regnal name the new pope chooses for himself. It's a bit of a potential minefield, to be negotiated with care; there are a number of antipopes - 41 I believe - and popes of dubious character littered though-out history.

If I was a betting man, I'd wager on one of the classics. There have been 23 Johns, 16 Gregorys, 16 Benedicts, 14 Clements, 13 Leos and - in name at least - 13 Innocents. John-Paul must also be a contender; neglected for most of papal history, it jumped from zero to two entries in 1978 alone. It is trending strongly. Looking further down the list, there are some that sound odd to modern ears. While I'd welcome a pope Lando, Dionysious, Valentine or especially Hilarious, I'm not exactly holding my breath for one of these names to be revived.

(Disclaimer: while I hope no Catholics are offended by the above, and in some ways I wish the new pope well, I also hope you can understand why many people cannot take the election and especially the doctrine of papal infallibility seriously.)
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby Dotsie » Tue Mar 12, 2013 4:57 pm

Brett's a nice name.

I can't see why it takes 4 days to play spin the bottle. Maybe they ring God and he keeps them on hold?

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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby chillicamper » Wed Mar 13, 2013 6:34 am

:lol: :lol:

Hilarious is a good name, but what about Pope Irrelevant :think:
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby Bouncy Castle » Wed Mar 13, 2013 9:31 am

Pope Sicola.


I'll get me coat.....
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby Dotsie » Wed Mar 13, 2013 9:57 am

Pope Goestheweasle.

Can you get mine too?
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby Tonyblack » Wed Mar 13, 2013 10:04 am

Maybe this one will be trying to get the media on his side to spread his word. How about Pope Erazzi? :lol:
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby Will of Lancre » Wed Mar 13, 2013 10:45 am

Nah, we've just got rid of Papa Ratzi, we don't want another one. :D
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby janet » Wed Mar 13, 2013 11:45 am

Wonder if the job spec now includes information revealed via Old Harry's Game... ie. former popes are kept in a pit in hell where they are all permanently 8 and a half months pregnant :twisted:
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby Tonyblack » Wed Mar 13, 2013 12:12 pm

Here are some fun facts about The Popes. ;)

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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby majomull » Wed Mar 13, 2013 12:29 pm

Probably won't get: Incontinent, Bubba, Big Willie, Corn, Sechubby.
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby Penfold » Wed Mar 13, 2013 12:42 pm

Tonyblack wrote:Here are some fun facts about The Popes. ;)

"He has two balls, and they are well hung."

I'd heard the one about the female pope before (it might have been on QI) but on reading that explanation I reckon the story would make very good movie material. :D
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby Tonyblack » Wed Mar 13, 2013 12:50 pm

You mean like this one in 1972, or this one in 2009? :lol:
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby raisindot » Wed Mar 13, 2013 1:10 pm

Let's not call him anything. Let's just ignore him.
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby Penfold » Wed Mar 13, 2013 1:13 pm

Tonyblack wrote:You mean like this one in 1972, or this one in 2009? :lol:

:shock: I'd never heard of them. :lol:
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Re: A Name Fit for a Pope

Postby KnightOfFewWords » Wed Mar 13, 2013 1:19 pm

I'm liking the suggestions. :D

Dotsie wrote:Brett's a nice name.


Funnily enough, there is a 'Pope Brett' on Twitter. He believes in God, Sport and Heavy Metal. My grasp of Catholic doctrine is a little shaky - is that what they call the Trinity?

Dotsie wrote:I can't see why it takes 4 days to play spin the bottle. Maybe they ring God and he keeps them on hold?


Maybe God enjoys a joke as much as the rest of us, and gives them all different names...

Tonyblack wrote:Here are some fun facts about The Popes. ;)


Much as I hate to cast doubt on a good story... I do find find that one a little unlikely. The first written account dates from more than a century after the supposed events and the ladypope is unnamed. In later accounts, she is referred to as Joan, and the date of her reign moved back 250 years. There could be some basis in fact, even if it's tenuous, but it all smacks of urban legend.

An alternative explanation for that throne is nearly as bizarre; it's possible that it was used to check if the Pope had been castrated. Quite how this would disqualify someone for popery is hard to say - maybe it was considered 'cheating' on the vow of celibacy.
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