I had to love the teacher who made H's IEP (name for what they expect her to succeed in for the year - goals) with counting to 100! Which she could already do!
Have to sort all that out for High School yet. I have no idea where to start. You woulnt take the hand of a child in grade two or three and plonk them in a high school seat... and expect them to learn the lesson! ARGH! I feel like she is just "turning up"... like its a day care... no she would learn more at a day care. Oh let me not forget her tow short lessons in "literacy" that is for children who arent "up to speed" with the current level of other students!!!
Our country pushes students through the system... one chance at a repeat at ONE class in primary school and one repeat on a class in high school... the "extra" two classes a week are supposed to make up for that... inclusive learning and all
I despair for my child.
Anyway.... found out that she was being bullied on her Facebook. Big time. She left her account open so I looked at the messages.... I was in tears! Showed Morgan and she was so upset. Close her account? The reason she HAS one is that we were teaching her how to use social media as its such an integral part of life here... and thought to do it while keeping a close eye on her.... HER page seemed fine... I was keeping an eye on it... and it HAS been good... taught her alot of lessons about fairness and being responsible.... it was the OTHER girls pages that were horrid. I didnt think to look at her friends pages... and I knew that all her "friends" were people she knew in real life....
They have posted things that "look" to H like nice posts... but they are foul. Things like "H as a boyfriend!... etc" (she had a little crush on a boy at the care center during Christmas) but the comments are backhanded and SO FREAKING NASTY! And H has commented on them in all innocence and they have had a field day with that as well.
Some of the private messages from two of the girls are just horrendous.
"You are so stupid. You cant even talk properly you stupid #$%#*#" And the part that brought me to tears is that she has tried to swear back at them and failed horribly... and they came back with more nasty comments.... Oh dear god... the line after line of her trying to swear at them in capital letters... she must have been so terribly hurt and angry and powerless.
Then they blocked her... then apologised and friended her again.... so they could post more nasty messages to her and laugh at her again. omg.
As M said... I wish I was their age and in school and could beat the brains out of them. They know she is intellectually impaired. HOW could they do this to her. Will they ever reach adulthood and have ANY pangs of guilt about how they treated this young girl????
I sent a message to two of the girls asking them to remove the offensive posts or I would see the school and their parents.
so.. M and I had a long talk to her (she was very defensive at first)... and we blocked a few of the girls. M sent a message to one of the nastier telling her nicely what she was doing was mean. Thing is.. as much as she knows when they are being REALLY mean... she has no idea when the other ones who are pretending to be nice are actually be very mean too setting her up.... and I doubt she ever will. (Hence why she got so defensive about some of the girls... "No Mum they are nice to me! They are my friends! Dont ruin it!"
Will have to sort this out this week at school... but I worry that it will lead to more nastiness at school. I dont think she has told me everything that is happening at school yet.
My heart is broken. I always used to say that the therapy and all was minor to what I was really worried about... H reaching teen years and what teens can do to an "outsider"... and the time is here and now. I am so worried for her. I am worried that boys will become involved too. I cant believe she didnt tell me any of this.. we always talk... and I am worried about what else she hasnt told us. I have spent the last week firming up our mother/daughter relationship big time (we are close in any case)... she has had SO much to deal with with the ex-arse being a total b***ard to her as well. (you have no idea) And I cant even depend on him by talking to him about this so he can help by watching her on social media at his place as he is such an ****hole he will only use it against her ... or me...
She has been off the wall with temper tantrums lately. Bursting into rages... but I put it down to hormones and starting high school and she had a really hard time during the weeks she spent at her fathers over the summer holidays. My poor little girl... no wonder.. dealing with this by herself.
Access to the internet is strictly monitored here now... though I cant monitor it at his place... I have convinced her that he can access her accounts (which according to M he can) at his place... so I have convinced her its best NOT to use his computer systems... (thats what he sticks her on to amuse her all day when he HAS to have her) but now we are back to weekend visits so its not such a long time for her to be offline.
On the plus side
I did find two lots of messages from older students in grade 10 (three years above her). They were school leaders when she moved to the upper primary school and took the younger kids under their wings... they have kept in contact with H as the high school and the primary campus is connected. They were lovely girls who answered her little "Hi!" messages by asking how she was and if she was okay and to come and say hello during lunchbreak at high school... and you can FEEL the understanding and kindness of these girls. I shall hunt them down and give them a hug. Their parents need to know they raised such lovely young adults.
I would like to hunt the other girls down too... I know one of the parents of one of them very well and she would be devastated if she knew her girl had done this.... but parents can be very defensive about their children... and we have very strict rules about parents talking to children or other parents about things like this. I shall talk to the school.
Great! Nice lead up to settling her into high school huh?
Just keep swimming... just keep swimming.. just keep swimming....