The teacher and I just had the kind of email exchange that would historically go tragically wrong. Got a response from her this morning and I'm so happy to report that it was sane and reasonable. This is a very good sign.
It was a huge relief to have the meeting go as well as it did. The first thing the director brought up was an email this teacher sent to the rest of the staff about me. This was a couple of months ago. She made some very snotty comments about me, meant only for the staff to see, but failed to remove my email address when she hit "reply all".
The director apologized and said, "That must have really just knocked you off your feet when you saw that." So right from the start I knew we weren't going to spend time pretending that things hadn't gone wrong. That made the whole meeting so much more productive.