Jokes

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Re: Jokes

Postby Bouncy Castle » Fri Jan 25, 2013 7:05 pm

A song for Dug!

Turn up the volume!

http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=MZ35SOU9HTM
Some are born great, some achieve greatness and some have greatness thrust upon them.

The rest of us are a bit crap.
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Re: Jokes

Postby The Mad Collector » Fri Jan 25, 2013 7:16 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:
One of those? Oh I'm sure I have one somewhere..

http://www.bearsonthesquare.com
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Re: Jokes

Postby Ghost » Fri Jan 25, 2013 7:19 pm

ImageImageImage
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Re: Jokes

Postby The Mad Collector » Fri Jan 25, 2013 7:25 pm

Wel timed as well as there will be more that a few Scots needing a quiet lie down to recover later tonight. I'm having a wee dram myself at the moment although the haggis has to wait until Monday for when my friend gets here






and I'm not even Scottish :roll:
One of those? Oh I'm sure I have one somewhere..

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Re: Jokes

Postby Who's Wee Dug » Fri Jan 25, 2013 7:45 pm

Bouncy Castle wrote:A song for Dug!

Turn up the volume!

http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=MZ35SOU9HTM

Thank you Bouncy someone emailed that to me the other day. :lol: off to the pub for a pint of heavy and a wee dram or three. :lol:
He willnae tak' a drink! I think he's deid! , on the other hand though A Midgie in yir hand is worth twa up yir kilt.
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Re: Jokes

Postby Dotsie » Sat Jan 26, 2013 1:23 pm

Went over to a Scottish friend's house last night, got a bit tipsy cos he made me have whisky but the haggis was good! :D
What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass!
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Re: Jokes

Postby Ghost » Fri Feb 08, 2013 10:54 am

The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against wall. The owner asks the clerk, "What's with that guy over there by the wall?"
The clerk says, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn't find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative."
The owner says, "You idiot! You can't treat a cough with laxatives!"
The clerk says, "Oh yeah? Look at him, he's afraid to cough!"
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Re: Jokes

Postby ChristianBecker » Fri Feb 08, 2013 11:42 am

That would be one of those off-label uses. :D
On with their heads! I'm the clown prince of fools
if you don't get the joke it's your loss
Love and laughter you see are the new currency
'cause greed's coinage is not worth a toss

Exile yourself to the unforgiving continent of Wraeclast!
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Re: Jokes

Postby Who's Wee Dug » Sat Feb 09, 2013 12:18 am

And this is the latest Moos of a horsey nature copied from Twitter.

I suppose Nigel Farage will be blaming Romanian horses for stealing British cows' jobs.
He willnae tak' a drink! I think he's deid! , on the other hand though A Midgie in yir hand is worth twa up yir kilt.
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Re: Jokes

Postby Ghost » Sun Feb 10, 2013 4:34 pm

A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary.

Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer.

The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behaviour." John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behaviour, the bird continued, "May I ask what the turkey did?"
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Re: Jokes

Postby Del » Sun Feb 10, 2013 5:34 pm

Bouncy Castle wrote:A song for Dug!

Turn up the volume!

http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=MZ35SOU9HTM


RING- ding- DIDDLE - AYE - DIDDLE - AYE - OHHHHHHHHH !

I have no sound. But I sang along... Lucky to have the main PC up and working :evil: Bloody kids! We have wi-fi and they have their own contraptions so they dont feel the need for the PC working!!!! I only got it working tonight because I told the teen I would not drive her to the boyfriends if she didnt fix it! :twisted:

RIng - ding - diddle - aye - diddle - aye - ohhhhhhhh......

Bit disappointed..... I waited and waited and that damn song only had a pic of a FLAG! Not a glimpse of blue ribbon!
Just keep swimming... just keep swimming.. just keep swimming....
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Re: Jokes

Postby Del » Mon Feb 11, 2013 12:01 am

Image

and on the same note....

Image
Just keep swimming... just keep swimming.. just keep swimming....
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Re: Jokes

Postby chillicamper » Mon Feb 11, 2013 7:00 am

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Wooden stuff at www.iwoodlovethat.co.uk
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Re: Jokes

Postby The Mad Collector » Mon Feb 11, 2013 8:38 am

:lol: :lol:
One of those? Oh I'm sure I have one somewhere..

http://www.bearsonthesquare.com
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Re: Jokes

Postby ChristianBecker » Mon Feb 11, 2013 9:39 am

:D
Very good!
On with their heads! I'm the clown prince of fools
if you don't get the joke it's your loss
Love and laughter you see are the new currency
'cause greed's coinage is not worth a toss

Exile yourself to the unforgiving continent of Wraeclast!
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