Frustration Thread 4

[Ghost]

dealt and almost done I'm changing my ebay account as soon as I get my last order

[Catch-up]

Glad to hear that Ghost!

On top of everything else I still seem to be dealing with something of a power struggle with Ava's teacher consultant. Every email response from her is either evasive, forces an engagement of verbal wrangling, or tries to imply that simply doing her job is going above and beyond. It's rather telling that what everyone else in the school district considers routine, she considers "above and beyond." I don't know if this is some sort of Scotty maneuver, where she makes everything sound impossible so that she looks like a hero when she manages it? I do know that my tolerance levels are dangerously low. I'm doing lots of deep breathing and forcing myself to wait a certain amount of time in responding, when possible. I'm walking around the house muttering either "Ommmm, ommmm" or "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming."

[Dotsie]

I don't know if this is some sort of Scotty maneuver, where she makes everything sound impossible so that she looks like a hero when she manages it?

Teachers love to do that - I am one, and we love to complain about e.g. marking. But I do hate marking! Hope it gets sorted soon

[Ghost]

I suggest another meeting except this time just with the headteacher providing printouts of emails and a request for this so called teacher to be retrained to the level where she can cope with the job at hand before she causes any more suffering to her students by her apparent inability cope with her workload

[ChristianBecker]

I don't know if this is some sort of Scotty maneuver, where she makes everything sound impossible so that she looks like a hero when she manages it?

Teachers love to do that - I am one, and we love to complain about e.g. marking. But I do hate marking! Hope it gets sorted soon

As Dotsie said.
Well, marking IS a sort of Greek bread (pita). Especially if you want to do it right.

[Catch-up]

I don't know if this is some sort of Scotty maneuver, where she makes everything sound impossible so that she looks like a hero when she manages it?

Teachers love to do that - I am one, and we love to complain about e.g. marking. But I do hate marking! Hope it gets sorted soon

And really, who doesn't love to do that? However, when six years worth of staff have deemed it routine before you, then you look just a little bit silly when you attempt to make it out as something more. She comes off as overwhelmed at best, and inept at worst. Truly, I think she is just overwhelmed due to personal reasons, school system changes and perhaps just being burnt out and ready to retire. And let's be honest, I'm overwhelming. Although, truly, I've tried to be diplomatic and patient (we're halfway through the school year now and still working on the same issues!!). If I think someone is evading a question or poo-pooing a concern, I react badly. I'm working on that, I really am. But the best I can usually manage is "intense".

I suggest another meeting except this time just with the headteacher providing printouts of emails and a request for this so called teacher to be retrained to the level where she can cope with the job at hand before she causes any more suffering to her students by her apparent inability cope with her workload

I've sort of done that, without actually coming out and doing that - if that makes sense. I haven't called her to the mat on any of this, but I've had conversations with the principal that make my point of view clear. I genuinely don't want to discount the work she is doing with Ava. She manages her workload a great deal. However, this week alone we've only gotten study guides two nights before the actual tests. One of those nights being used to find the answers, so the actual studying is only the night before and then, much to Ava's delight, squeezed in at breakfast. No one wants to prep for a test that way. So, obviously, she's still falling short in her management skills. And, despite our history together, still seems to think she can evade questions - as if that will turn out well. Not much of a learning curve for a teacher.

By the way, have I said you guys are awesome? Thanks for letting me have my tantrums here.

[Catch-up]

I don't know if this is some sort of Scotty maneuver, where she makes everything sound impossible so that she looks like a hero when she manages it?

Teachers love to do that - I am one, and we love to complain about e.g. marking. But I do hate marking! Hope it gets sorted soon

As Dotsie said.
Well, marking IS a sort of Greek bread (pita). Especially if you want to do it right.

Um... this is embarrassing, but I don't get it.

[The Mad Collector]

PITA = Pain In The Ass
Pita = Greek bread

[Catch-up]

OH!! Thanks Mad.

[wicked woman]

Too innocent for this place Catch-up. I'm with you about people who mess about and don't do their job properly. You have done well not to tell her what you think.

[Broccolee]

My eldest daughter has behavioral issues that make socializing and classroom routines very difficult for her.She is very intelligent though,so she has managed the entry to a grammar school.
Since day one,there have been a lot of problems in the class,admittedly,she has been rather difficult,not only in school,but I blame this in part on our family situation and the recent divorce and also on the new situation in school because she can't cope well with changes and new people.
I was completely honest with the teachers from day one,but this is turning out to be a bit of a problem.

She is being mobbed badly (nasty tricks,insulting,even stuff stolen and destroyed) and I have hadtalks with the teacher repeatedly.She's of the opinion that as my daughter has these issues and has 'startedoff badly' in the class,it must be her fault,as all the other kids get along fine with one another.So when my daughter came home on Tuesday crying yet again,I decided to keep her home for a while.She's doing her schoolwork with me and I informed the teacher of my decision and told her she would come back as soon as there is a sensible solution for the problem.I told her she has these issues,yes,but she also has had a lot of bad experiences with her father and I would not endanger her mental health for a bunch of sillygirls glad to have found a victim.She was rather shocked and promised to sort it out within the week.
We do not have school workers for special needs kids in normal schools here.Special needs kids go to special needs schools and thats that,regardless of their intelligence level.There are integrative prinary schools but no such secondary or grammar schools,so as she wants to be a librarian(she obsesses about books)she hasn't any choice but to try and get on in the 'normal' school.
You can apply for a school worker chaperone to accompany your child at school,but they have to have a certain degree of mental or bodily disability for that,which my daughter does not have,and then grammar schools do not always accept this even then.

[Conforumist]

Sounds like a blatant case of bullying to me Broc'. And I'm not trying to scare you, but suicide happens all too frequently because of it. I'm really surprised that it is not being taken more seriously; specially in Germany.

[Catch-up]

Broc, that's awful! I'm so sorry your daughter was put through that. She's so lucky to have you. Good for you for pulling her out and giving that teacher a piece of your mind. I hope she really does straighten it out as promised.

[Dotsie]

As above. Blaming a child for being bullied is despicable behaviour

[Broccolee]

The teacher phoned me today.She said she spoke with the class and some of the kids confirmed B's story.The teacher said she was shocked and 'very sorry'.
She said she talked with the worst bullies and asked them precisely which issues they have with my daughter.They were rather quiet and she wants to talk with them and their parents.
I asked her if she thought my daughter needed to change classes.
She said she was so sorry she missed what was going on and she wants to sort it out,because she thinks even if she changes classes the problem would only be postponed,not solved.
My daughter is to please come back on Monday and she will play a game with all of them together in recess.

Yes,because if she hadn't I would have to have gone to the school officials and explain why my daughter is not going to school and I guess she knew that...would have been a mite uncomfy for her...she'd have to explain why she wasn't up to the situation.