Jokes - Part Deux

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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby Del » Tue Dec 11, 2012 5:22 am

Dug.... just to show how understanding we can be sweetie.. we'll give you a head start .... run...
Just keep swimming... just keep swimming.. just keep swimming....
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby Who's Wee Dug » Tue Dec 11, 2012 11:16 am

Welll it's true ask any man, and it's probably been heavily edited to reduce the size. :lol:
He willnae tak' a drink! I think he's deid! , on the other hand though A Midgie in yir hand is worth twa up yir kilt.
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby chris.ph » Tue Dec 11, 2012 12:14 pm

the revised edition will be out when theyve changed their minds again :whistle: :whistle:
measuring intelligence by exam results is like measuring digestion by turd length
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby Del » Tue Dec 11, 2012 12:16 pm

Oh!

Heavily edited?!!!!!!

Run Dug.... run like you have never run before .......

Edit: and you might want to grab your mate chris and teach him to run...
Just keep swimming... just keep swimming.. just keep swimming....
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby chris.ph » Tue Dec 11, 2012 12:19 pm

never :lol: :lol:
measuring intelligence by exam results is like measuring digestion by turd length
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby Del » Tue Dec 11, 2012 12:25 pm

That book would be perfect for "pressing"... . Roses... peonies ... daisies.... slow moving men...
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby chris.ph » Tue Dec 11, 2012 12:44 pm

even that book would be to small to press me del :lol: :lol:
measuring intelligence by exam results is like measuring digestion by turd length
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby Who's Wee Dug » Tue Dec 11, 2012 1:05 pm

Could do with the exercise Del it would be like being back in the Gym bench pressing. :P :mrgreen:
He willnae tak' a drink! I think he's deid! , on the other hand though A Midgie in yir hand is worth twa up yir kilt.
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby MongoGutman » Tue Dec 11, 2012 2:38 pm

"Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood." - Oscar Wilde

"If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning." - Aritotle Onasis

"This is a man's world This is a man's world But it wouldn't be nothing, nothing Without a woman or a girl" - James Brown
Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves? Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here? Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change? ~~ Oddball
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby Del » Tue Dec 11, 2012 4:12 pm

Ahhhhhhh.... a voice of reason... finally.
Just keep swimming... just keep swimming.. just keep swimming....
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby The Mad Collector » Tue Dec 11, 2012 4:32 pm

Women don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think - in a deeper voice.
Bill Cosby

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
Robert A. Heinlein

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.
Katharine Hepburn

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
Phyllis Diller

Guys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated as they are, only way more mysterious. The whole point is guys are not thinking much. They are just what they appear to be. Tragically.
Dave Barry

Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.
H. L. Mencken

When women go wrong, men go right after them.
Mae West

All women should know how to take care of children. Most of them will have a husband some day.
Franklin P. Jones
One of those? Oh I'm sure I have one somewhere..

http://www.bearsonthesquare.com
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby Del » Tue Dec 11, 2012 4:37 pm

Girls, beware the "Still waters run deep" type of man... he may just be a stagnant pool.
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby chris.ph » Tue Dec 11, 2012 6:43 pm

somebody call :whistle: :whistle:
measuring intelligence by exam results is like measuring digestion by turd length
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby chris.ph » Thu Dec 13, 2012 6:45 pm

a book just fell on my head-------- ive only got my shelf to blame :whistle: :whistle:
measuring intelligence by exam results is like measuring digestion by turd length
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Re: Jokes - Part Deux

Postby Jack Remillard » Thu Dec 13, 2012 7:50 pm

Susan emailed ten different puns to friends, in the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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