Frustration Thread 3

[Dotsie]

Well done on making progress Catch-up, you've been much better behaved than I would have been But even if you weren't meant to see the comments, they were still unprofessional. I would never even hint at insulting someone in a work email, as students have a right to see all communications relating to them, if they want. Could be embarrassing if you were a bit careless with your words

[Catch-up]

Chilli, we've had the same experience this year. Face to face they say all the right things, in practice it's a different story though. The few times we've met Ava's math teacher she's been very personable and friendly, tells us to just email her with any questions, she's happy to help us. The reality is that I have emailed her on 4 separate occasions with specific questions about assignments and grades. Wanna know how many times she's responded? Zero.

Dotsie, it wasn't easy to be well behaved, I promise you. I walked into that meeting planning to call her out, not realizing at the time that I saw the one email by accident. I did at one point ask her very pointedly, "Exactly how would you prefer that I get this information from you?" It made sense after the fact that she looked so startled by the question. I agree with you. Even if the parent/customer could never see the email, being unprofessional makes you look bad to your boss and your coworkers. Not a good move.

When she left the message yesterday, she left her number so that I could call her back, but also said I didn't have to if I didn't want to. It was awkward because I didn't want to, but sort of felt like I should, since she went to the trouble. Derek talked me out of it and said we should just communicate with her at the school and through email. Who knows, maybe she was relieved to get our answering machine.

[michelanCello]

Let us know how it went, Susanne! Hugs!

[Catch-up]

Instead of calling her back I just wrote her a thank you note and sent it in with Ava today. I felt that would be a more personal way to acknowledge it without having to call her back. At this point I'm willing to ignore the events of the last few days and just move forward. I'm not upset anymore, just want to do whatever it takes to work together and keep Ava moving forward. I am however, going to meet with the principal, I think tomorrow, to discuss the communication issues as a whole. Then hopefully that will be the end of it.

[Del]

(((((((((((((((Sharlene and Tony)))))))))))))))
Stinks huh? Tell me about red tape!!! ARGH. Hope this all gets sorted soon and Tony can come over Sharlene. Its must be so frustrating and its so stupid. Good luck.

Catch-up and Chilli: ARGH for both of you. THough reading these threads I am sitting here thinking; YOU guys can email teachers? YOU guys have time limits for teachers to reply to notes or questions???? (and I am talking UK AND USA here!!!!) Yee gads.. we are lucky to get a teacher interview once a year... and lets play note lotto for finding a time the teacher is available and I am not working... (well cant impede on thier teaching time, lunch time and certainly cant taqlk to them after school right? They have homes to get home to too!)

My lovely niece has an Autistic child and has just been told he will be expelled if he fails yet another test this term!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have no words for it.... we have been telling her to get the local MP and perhaps a solicitor. H's school isnt that bad at least.

[KingCarrot]

Omg, that is awful Del. Let me know how that unfolds if it ain't too much trouble.

That is just, incomprehensible.

[cheery_j.]

YOU guys can email teachers? YOU guys have time limits for teachers to reply to notes or questions???? (and I am talking UK AND USA here!!!!) Yee gads.. we are lucky to get a teacher interview once a year... and lets play note lotto for finding a time the teacher is available and I am not working... (well cant impede on thier teaching time, lunch time and certainly cant taqlk to them after school right? They have homes to get home to too!)

Can I please come and teach in Australia? Right now I'm fed up to the back teeth with one student + mom. We've been giving this child not only second chances, but also third, fourth, fifth ... well, LOTS of chances. We have talked to the mother, to the kid, to both of them together. We've written letters and called her - we only didn't write her postcards from our holidays. We involved the head teachers, social workers and the school psychologist. NOTHING ever changed in the kid's behaviour.
The problem is that the mother believes that her child can't have done anything wrong and that the fact that the little one has been getting into trouble with more or less every teacher in THREE different schools is of course due to a huge teacher conspiracy. Of course she also accuses us of incompetence.

What really really annoys me is that there are a number of nice kids in my class who might do well if only they got a bit more quality time with their teachers. However, we more or less neglect them at the moment because all our energies are taken up by one kid whose parents are either unable or unwilling to teach their offspring how to behave and then blame it on the school.

This is definitely NOT what I had in mind when I decided to become a teacher.

End of rant.

[Penfold]

I'm shocked and appalled Del, that in this day and age a school would even consider acting in such a manner. Your niece should also contact the local media because who knows what stories they might want to cover, especially if they have a slow news day.

I think you've gone about it in the right way, Susanne, but I would still be tempted to show the principle a copy of the Email that you weren't meant to see, together with your evidence that the teacher is talking out of their backside and that you are just being a responsible parent.

[michelanCello]

Del, that's awful... how can people be so uncomprehensive?

Cheery, I'm sorry for your frustration, and I admire the effort you and your collegues put into this kid! Maybe he'll se one day, and will be a better man of it...

[Catch-up]

Del, I know. I have to remind myself that overall we're incredibly lucky. This is one incident compared to years of fantastic communication. We have been absolutely spoiled at the level of contact we get with Ava's teachers.

Penfold, the principal definitely saw it because she copied him in on it! She copied him in on her apology email to me, so I assume he discussed the problem with her. I've scored a sit down with him this morning. It's just a friendly chat about how communication works overall there so that I know what to expect - and he knows what we need - moving forward. In a backwards kind of way she sort of did me a favor. Her screw up gives me a good platform to address some other communication problems. Wish me luck!

[Dotsie]

Good luck!

[Batty]

Good Luck, Catch-up!

[Catch-up]

Thanks! I just got back and it went sooooo fabulously! It far exceeded my expectations. I met with the principal ('cause he's the boss) and the school psychologist ('cause she already knows us well). It was so friendly and comfortable that it wasn't at all awkward discussing the communication issues and what to expect moving forward. We worked through that fairly quickly actually, and I thought I'd be ushered on my way after that, but they both sat there with me for so long, asking questions, discussing plans, relaying stories about Ava (great ones!). They made me feel like they would have sat there all day with me if necessary. Most importantly we all seem to be on the same page and I feel like we have support and an avenue of recourse if anything goes wrong in the future. This is a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. I can go into the break and the trip without this weighing on my mind.

[Bouncy Castle]

[Catch-up]

Cheery, I meant to say how sorry I am that you are dealing with parents like that. I know teachers do not have it easy and I have no idea how they manage sometimes. One of the goals we have in keeping communication flowing regularly is so that we can address it if our children behave in a way they shouldn't at school. There are consequences if they misbehave. We make sure they know that if something happens at school we WILL hear about it. Luckily it's not something we have to deal with often. Hope things get better!