Frustration Thread 3

[michelanCello]

Hugs, Dotsie! I'm sure everything will be all right... my granny always says: relationships are like a sine wave

[Jan Van Quirm]

Go DO something you know you both like to do.... away from the place where its boiling up... like the house.

I've an idea! As it's due to rain later on today, and for the next few days, I think Del's suggestion of doing something you both like is a good one. On the way back home from the restaurant (or wherever), get him wet and roll him in mud!
He'll thank you for it, later!!!

Mr. Dotsie looks gooooood in mud! Can we have pictures purr-lease?

Seriously - like everyone's saying better (getting it all) out than (keeping it all) in & going out is an important part of that as you both need to pay a bit more attention and behave yourselves (mostly, if you stay away from the mud - but in your case don't do that... ).

[Jan Van Quirm]

Feeling a bit down and weepy atm but as I've messed my pills up this week (forgot my night meds and then keep forgetting to add them to my daily containers ) I suppose it's not surprising.

Not helping though is Xena, or rather her history which is coming out more and more now, although she's actually settled in with us really well. She had her third 'accident' in the house this morning and the quotes are because 2 of them have been within minutes of her coming in from a walk or being out in the garden. Her house training status wasn't really known but she's been mostly immaculate since coming to us so it's a little alarming that the last 2 incidents have been in as many days and when we both were around in the living room but on the computer so not paying her any attention (as she'd just come back from a walk/being outside) and had been watered and fed. Each time we've given her a telling off and a (very) little tap on the bottom to let her know she's behaved 'badly' and what the boundaries are but...

Every time we do the 'naughty' voice or make a sudden move she just rolls over onto her back in submission and goes completely floppy. She does this even if we're picking her up for a cuddle and although she loves the attention she still doesn't really get being handled or played with. Luckily Toby's starting to get used to her and has stopped ignoring her because she's not interested in playing, so she's getting better on the whole but this whole pooping on the (new - of course ) rug is happening for no real reason that we can see other than she's nervous for one reason or another perhaps.

We were told her previous owners had neglected her and her 3 siblings, but now we're not so sure as, although she's not seeming to be afraid of us or even shying away, she's so completely submissive to discipline or affection and, as well as turning in circles (a sign of boredom or compulsive sensation-seeking) she also trembles slightly at times and scratches herself constantly, even though she's been frontlined and has no visible insect bites or rashes. I'm beginning to think it's a kind of self-harming maybe and the pooping's started up partly because she's starting to settle and trust us but unable to understand our signals for play-time and 'how to behave'? Whatever it is the bar stewards who had her before for several years have obviously screwed her up good and proper and may have hurt her quite badly at times so that her 'flopping' is in fact a kind of extreme cringing, or behaviour to avoid more attacks of whatever kind...

Will be taking her to the vet soon anyway - her fur's been growing back after having to be shaved away because of her befouled state when the RSPCA first found her but she's been scratching/biting herself so much that there's a bare patch starting on her hindquarters where the skin seems perfectly healthy and pink otherwise. No question of her going back - she's a really sweet little dog and starting to feel at home and seems more confident overall I think/hope - I just wish we could help her more and get over this latest little setback.

[Tonyblack]

*HUGS* Jan.

[Who's Wee Dug]

I hope she settles down soon Jan, see you on Friday or Saturday in Wincanton.

[michelanCello]

Hugs, Jan!

Look, Xena has been at your place for... what, a month? You don't have to be so hard on yourself, she'll be fine, just give her some time... or wouldn't it help to take her to dog classes maybe?

[Jan Van Quirm]

Thanks chaps - I'm not blaming myself exactly it's just hard to see how she is and really not be able to do anything except be very patient with her. I can do patient at least and I'll just have to be a bit more careful when I do my drug regime next time

Will be in Wincanton on the Friday and Saturday Dug - at the Dolphin!

[swreader]

This has not been a good day! Woke up at 5:30 to go to bathroom, and realized I was seeing spots (which I know means low blood sugar). It was 52 which is dangerously low, and took forever (glucose, OJ, more glucose) to get it up. After breakfast, I called my doctor's office, and he said to cut one of the diabetic drug dose in half. Realized at lunch time that I hadn't taken any of the morning meds, so was able to take all the rest including the lower dose at noon with lunch. But was feeling so exhausted that I told Tony I was going to take a nap.

Kicked off shoes, went over and lowered blind, headed for recliner and tripped over the shoes (I knew I'd find a use for that smilie), and fell flat on my face on the carpet--avoiding a sharp edged stand for the Boom box by inches. When I got up from the floor (with some difficulty) I discovered that though I hadn't broken my glasses, I had rug burns on my forehead (on a goose egg the size that hen laid) and down my nose. And my arm & shoulder hurt. So, called the doctor's office again, and this time they said come in.

Couldn't find anyone who could take me, but made it there safely and was checked over and pronounced OK, but warned that though I'd caught the swelling with an ice pack (so it had gone down), they thought I'd probably have a black eye. I'm also to eat a snack at bedtime--as a preventative of another sugar crash, though I have no idea what caused it.

I'm going to take it easy and hope tomorrow is a better day.

[chillicamper]

Sounds like a rough day! Hope you feel better soon and get the sugars under control.

If you get a black eye, you do realise that you will have to make up a suitably heroic story to tell everyone about how you got it.

[Penfold]

Hopefully the blood/sugar thing is just a one off and the meds and snack can prevent a future occurrence SW.

Just a thought Jan, from what you say is Xena's reaction to your 'naughty' voice, I wonder if she is deliberately being naughty just as her way of getting attention from you? I read/heard somewhere that children from a deprived upbringing would sometimes misbehave with the idea that even negative attention was better than no attention. I was wondering if spending an extra ten or fifteen minutes with her after you get home from her walkies and fed and watered her might make a difference. Off course, I might be barking up the wrong tree entirely.

[Tonyblack]

I just spoke to Sharlene on Skype (it's 10.45 pm in Tucson and 6.45 am in Cardiff). She's very tired and sore and we are both trying not to think of how much worse it could have been (remembers the fall where she tore her leg open and was lying in a pool of blood a few years back). It's so frustrating being so far away when things like this happen.

*HUGS* Sharlene.

[Dotsie]

(((hugs))) Jano & Sharlene

Sharlene, could it be postural hypotension? Sometimes if I'm tired I get low blood pressure, & standing quickly gives me spots & makes me dizzy. My MIL once stood up fainted, & it definitely wasn't low blood sugar because she'd just eaten.

[wicked woman]

So glad it wasn't any worse Sharlene. Must be so frustrating for you and Tony when he can't be there.

Jan, I think you might be over thinking it, some dogs are naturally submissive and that's probably better than having one that won't accept it's position in the pack. Doesn't have to mean she is terrified of you. We had a rescue dog that was terrified of men, took her a year to realise that Mr WW would never hurt her. She will be ok, just keep up the firm but fair approach and give her lots of attention when she's being good.

About the itching, could be a tiny mite, to small to see without a magnifying glass or just that she's got herself into a viscous circle of behaviour. If the vet says she's clear of mites I would bath her using something like baby shampoo.

[michelanCello]

Hugs, Sharlene! Hope it doesn't hurt too much and that your blood sugar will behave now!

[chris.ph]

get well soon swreader.

it will take a while for xena to find her place in the pack jan, but as soon as she feels more secure you should have a lovely little pet. my last dog jet was a rescue and he realised fairly quickly that i was the boss, troy was the same as we didnt get him until he was 7 months old, just keep on as you are doing but with more wine