The Ankh-Morpork Times
I had this idea that I thought might be fun and creative. This thread is the editing desk of the A-M Times and we are all Discworld citizens making contributions.
The items that you post can be all sorts: an article about things happening in the city, a sports report, a letter to the editor, an advertisement – anything that you might find in the A-M Times.
Be inventive and have fun.
Here’s an advertisement that I’ve come up with:
Instructive! Interesting!! Fulfilling!!!
Come and spend time on a working holiday in the Ramtops Cultural Centre!
Centred in a forest setting just one mile from the picturesque hamlet of Bad Ass in the Kingdom of Lancre our staff will instruct you in such useful folk crafts as goat husbandry, thatching, privy digging and the collecting of (mostly) apples to make the traditional mountain spirit of Scumble.
Apply now to make sure of a place. The holiday costs just AM$50 per person* (non-refundable).
Applications by Clacks to greebo’firstname.lastname@example.org
We’ll have a warm welcome waiting for you!
*All fees must be made in advance and are non-refundable. Does not include transport to and from the Cultural Centre. Please note that the organisers except no responsibilty for illness, injury or death sustained by visitors, nor does it include damage or theft of property. We also accept no responsibility for visitors being turned into amphibians or rodents. 'Not knowing' is NOT an excuse. Local laws forbid the imbibing of scumble by outsiders. The mentioning of the secret locations of the scumble distilleries to officers of the law and/or Revenuemen will be seen as an act of hostility by locals, so don't say you weren't warned. Moaning and griping about conditions at the Cultural Centre will not be tollerated and unless the visitors want to spend their whole visit sitting on a lilypad and eating flies, they had better not! No one likes a snitch and especially not a poncy city snitch. These disclaimers do not effect your legal rights.**
**You haven't got any.
Look, you've got it all wrong! You don't NEED to follow ME, You don't NEED to follow ANYBODY! You've got to think for your selves! You're ALL individuals!
Yes! We're all individuals!