I'll give you the context and the copy and then you can judge for yourself. This is standard (and het) literary fiction with a dark comic edge and just after a rather physical romantic reunion that happens off-page...
I wrote:Much, much later (t)he scent of burning marula wood wafted in from the garden as Luey was finishing off his second shower. Sophie was about to call him when he came back into the bedroom, rubbing a towel over his head energetically and so didn't at first take in that she'd changed.
All I did was take off the 1st 3 words off and it still works (except it's improved for that
A good editor is (nearly) worth their weight in gold if you want to avoid being too cliched.
Actually that's an interesting point and it's a minefield treading a line between keeping it 'real' and firmly in the vernacular as opposed to getting too mannered or enthusiastically 'right on' - I also used the expression "she was the real deal"
to describe my heroine in the eyes of her newly beloved and all ed could see was this chap
so I had to take it out even though it's a valid if innocuous comment and not an uncommon expression outside of the antique pseuds world
In the end it's a question of how much you're 'enamoured' of the fit of the apparently stinky expression. My rule of thumb in the editing relationship is I'll stick with my first thoughts when she fails to make me feel embarassed about what I've put down. If life was
good and that feels right then what's wrong with saying so?