Marry nuncle, be Sjoerd the front end of an ass? Verily nay.
Marry nuncle, be Sjoerd the back end of an ass? Verily nay
Prithee sire, then Sjoerd must be NO END OF AN ASS!
(Fools' Guild Approved Joke #3)
So Sjord, take your cap, your bells and your bladder onna stick and bugger off back to the Fools' Guild where you belong.
Good day boys and girls. It gives me great pleasure to stand before you and congratulate the five people who successfully passed the Entrance Examination for the MA course.
Firstly mC. A cakewalk. With Sjoerd as a killer she was never in any danger whatsoever.
Secondly Simstars. For a newbie she coped admirably. Her "sea of geniuses" line was without doubt the funniest line of the whole exam.
Thirdly Jano. She passed without even trying. Usually when she tries, she's crap and always loses.
Fourthly Dotise. What can I say? She single-handedly won the game, and in the process saved the lives of Poisondot, Simstars and her own. She has already been awarded a Diamond Star for excellence above and beyond the call of duty (first one ever awarded). Further good news for her is that she was so impressive that she has also smashed the Assassin Guild's glass ceiling and will be the first ever female headboy...er...Headwimmin.
Fifthly, a special scholarship has been awarded to Gawper Del for spotting Sjoerd's slip of the tongue when he admitted he was a killer. As she lives in XXXX, a map has been sent to her giving instructions on how to find the Assassins Guild in Ankh-Morpork.
And let's not forget poor Willem and Poisondot who both proved to be more entertaining and funny dead than when alive.
Finally, a big thank you to the Fools' and Clowns' Guild for providing the most inept, most bumbling, crappest killers ever in the history of this game.
So on your feet and let's sing the Guild anthem (which we share with the Alchemists' Guild)
That will be all. Class dismissed.
*A Poohcarrot Production (2011). All rights are reserved - that includes you too, Transworld!