Corrupt-a-wish

[Ponder Stibbons]

How are you supposed to see them?

Ha! exactly.
Well that was lucky, then. I thought i was going to take on Arty Fowl and then we would be in trouble. nice answer.

You amazing become suddenly brilliant at it. and i could say exactly the same thing as with zelda but i'm not.
You get so good you rise quickly through the ranks of worldwide players and join a tournament to try to take on the world champion at counter-strike and win, but he gets so annoyed he sends you a wireless virus to add insult to injury which not only makes your computer crash, but also eats its inards and reduces it to a microwave with odd personality disorders.

Edit: I wish i had a dog, preferably a border collie or a rottweiler called jesus.

[Quark]

Well that was lucky, then. I thought i was going to take on Arty Fowl and then we would be in trouble. nice answer.

Aha! Another Artemis Fowl reader.
The funny thing is, Eoin Colfer used the Stefan Bashkir name twice. Once in The Arctic Incident, as the chess champion Artemis poses at at the border checkpoint, and one of the main characters of The Supernaturalist. They seem to have absolutely nothing to do with each other.

You have a rottweiler called Jesus. A local religious fanatic finds out about it, and insists it's a work of Satan, etc, etc. He captures it, but it is driven mad by his obsession with new age music and headbutts its way through a brick wall to escape (Superpowered by the curious properties of supermarket pizza). When you get it back it is unable to do anything except waddle unevenly and shiver.

I wish I could meet Einstein

[Ponder Stibbons]

Yes. Unfortunately the only other books apart from the 6 arty books i've read is the WIsh List.
As i dont want to hog(father) the thread i'll just gawp.
*Gawp....gawp....gawp*
Any idea if he's going to write any more arty books.
I wonder why Stefan Bashkir didn't bash Artemis then.......

[Quark]

He is working on one after The Time Paradox... It's just that he was roped in to write the sixth book for The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, after Douglas Adams died in 2001 and never finished it, so he's writing a new one, even as we speak

[Ponder Stibbons]

If you read artemis fowl and havent read the 6th do not read the following. It is a spoiler.







Ah, i see. i had the feeling he would write one involving Opal hacking herself out of prison and that she had put a mind kibosh on that dwarf.

[mystmoon]

Eoin did say all his books take place in the same universe (2 Myishi Corporations, 2 Phonetix) so maybe Stephan Bashkir in Supernaturalist is a descendant? (god, i'm such a geek)

Getting back to the thread...
You met Einstein, but he doesn't talk to you because he's thinking about the universe and whatnot. Frustrated by his lack of interest in you, you disprove the theory of relativity causing Einstein lovers to lynch u

I wish I had telekinesis powers (moving stuff without touching it)

[Quark]

That's funny... I thought Phonetix was a real company .

maybe Stephan Bashkir in Supernaturalist is a descendant

It's possible, as the one in The Supernaturalist is a second-generation Russian descendant of Satellite City, and I'm pretty sure that the one Artemis impersonates is Russian too. Certainly, he was using it at a Russian border checkpoint.

Still trying to think of a way to screw up telekineses...

[bikkit]

You now have teleteknisis. Unfortunatley, you do it wrong, smash a hammerinto your head and die. Summerey: teleteknisis, ur doin it wrong.

I wish my headphones would work again (I sat on them)

[Ponder Stibbons]

THey are fixed. Then, your small but annoying younger bikkit nick...i mean borrows them and loses them, as well as your laptop, psp, bikkits and interesting rock.

I wish i had a library.

[Quark]

You have the greatest library in the world, a proud center of the world's knowledge, reputed to contain, among other things, the diary of Genghis Khan and Einstein's notepad. Of course, you have no choice but to open it to the public. A small child, however, picks his nose and wipes it on a book. The mucus contains a fungus which slowly eats away at wood and paper, until one day your library collapses into dust.

I wish I was a better programmer.

[bikkit]

I have no siblings, or psps

Edit:woops. Ok... You are the best programmer ever. Then your cat steps on your keyboard and deletes everything. You then spend the rest of you life in mourning, comleteley forgetting that you had back-ups on yuor laptop.

Re-edit: I wist stepenie meyer woul die in mysterious circumstances now.

[mystmoon]

Stephanie Meyer dies in suspicious circumstances, the world is then overrun by grief-ridden fangirls, who, in their attempts to recreate vampirism contract a disease similar to the one in 28 Days Later and overrun the Earth

I wish I could get top marks in my a-level results

[Penfold]

OK, you get top marks in all your A Levels but realize that due to 'exams getting easier each year' (according to the press anyway ), the only question you had to answer was at the top of the page and read "What's my name?", making them worthless; and that you had wasted all that time and hard work studying and revising.

I wish I was taller.

[Quark]

You are the tallest man in the world. This earns you a place in the Guinness Book of World Records, but you are driven mad by the constant rubberneckers and being knocked unconscious by low-flying aircraft and door-frames.

I wish the school would hurry up and give me my netbook. (They're waiting 'til term 2 to give us them for some reason) CS LAN much?

[Ponder Stibbons]

Your school is giving you the netbook!!
Ok. You get your netbook, but, because they had to hurry it up, it doesn't have the software necessary to install drivers for any kind of memory card, flash disk or anything else except for a cd driver which is already installed but which is pretty bloody useless as it doesnt have a cd drive. This means that you cant do any work on it and get a big fat zero in all subjects.

I wish I had a dog.