Corrupt-a-wish

[unseenu]

You have all the powers activated at once and the conflicting ones cause significant discomfort.You turn them off one by one but there are so many this takes hundreds of years of constant meditation

I wish I could change camera angles in real life

[Ogamis]

(... That's a little unclear. I'm interpreting it as what I think you mean, as being able to look from lots of different perspectives, as if your eyes were connected to inisible floating cameras you could move anywhere, or like on a video game where you can change the camera location and angle)

You can, but it ruins your life. while you are looking down on yourself from the sky to make sure you don't miss anything on the ground, you can't see doorways or peoples faes, and look like an ideot. with so man vews ad angels, you find it har to controll, and often get your view stuck inside a wall. while watching tv at home you accidentally walk straight into a road and are run down

i wish douglas adams was still alive

[unseenu]

You go to meet him and inadvertantly make yourself look like the world's most annoying fanboy,as a result he hates you(this seems vaguely fammiliar,I may have used it for someone elses wish)

I wish I could know the time and date instinctively

[Ogamis]

when this wish comes true you suddenly realize that you have just wasted an amazing gift. animal rigts activists and green peace supporters pelt your house with fruit for your idiotic and self serving wish. you dream of hw life would have been had you taken the wish more seriousless, become manically depressed, and end up hanging yourself


i wish i could eat and do what i liked and always retain perfect health, physique and body tone

[unseenu]

You are chained to a wall and experimented on for the rest of your life by an unscrupulous weight loss company

I wish I could travel on all public transport including planes for free

[meerkat]

you fly here,ther, and everywhere. But eventually the Ryan air operatives gang up on you because you are using up the world's fuel resources and other people are getting shirty.
You are discovered on a desert island usinga silk parachute as a tent. A sign on the island beach says:

Leave all items on this island intact
Do not remove inhabitants!

They oblige and you are left to fend for yourself forever.

I wish I could find a cure for Thoughtlessness.

[Ogamis]

Everyone thinks about everything all the time; they can't help it thanks to you. Its starts as couples going hugely over the top to please each other, but neither can be happy because that means inconveniancing the other person. eventually no one can eat because they are thinking about the staving, and are overcome by death, disease and disability. everyone either kills themselves or just wastes away

i wish i had the power to interview the dead and thus write brilliant history and english essays

[unseenu]

You are accused of cheating and making stuff up because some of what the dead tell you aren't the lies that got written in the history books.You are thrown out of all academic institutions and are forced to make a living as a remarkably good psychic playing to small seedy theatres for the rest of your life.

I wish for a new lid for my sugar pot(I dropped the old one and it smashed in two)

[Ogamis]

You get a new... sugar bowl lid... but, um.... well....

ITS TOO SMALL!!! Dum, dum DUM!!!!! small enough that when you try to put it on, it falls straight into the pot!!!! In fact, its so small you mistake it for a grain of sugar!! Oh the delicious irony!!

I wish i didn't have a cold today

[author3]

Instead you had fever
I wish I could go outside

[Ogamis]

When you do, it "somehow manages to cause a tsunami"... yeah... i'm still annoyed about that...

you also get stung by a swarm of killer beas, attacked by rabid chipmonks, struck by lightning, and a mysterious stranger throws a brick at you. the outside can be a worrying place

I wish someone would answer my "thats not very philosophical" question
and do so sensibly
well, not that sensibly, thats the point, its meant to be humourously basic, but...
look it up

[ShadowNinjaCat]

Someone answers your question sensibly, but in a language you don't know.

I wish my hair never got dirty.

[author3]

but then you wanted your hair to become dirty
I wish my friend didn't have to go home in an hour and 5 minutes

[ShadowNinjaCat]

Your friend has to go home right now.

I wish I had more peppermint tart.

[unseenu]

The next tart is contaminated and makes you very ill

I wish I had a full size robotic horse