urban myths

(For General Discussion)

Moderators: Jason, Toothy, Tonyblack

urban myths

Postby chris.ph » Fri Jun 19, 2009 5:00 pm

weve mentioned a few on the board, does anybody out there got any good ones :?:
measuring intelligence by exam results is like measuring digestion by turd length
User avatar
chris.ph
Member
 
Posts: 8678
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2008 11:52 am
Location: swansea south wales

Postby bikkit » Fri Jun 19, 2009 5:03 pm

1999 Urban Legend
(April 1999) Two students were in love and engaged. Unfortunately all of the parents involved disapproved of the marriage. The parents had threatened dire measures if the students eloped. Caught in an impossible position of choosing between their love and their families, the students decided they would leave the world together.

"Juliet" told her friend, a pharmacist, that she was having trouble sleeping before exams, and asked her for potent sleeping pills. The pharmacist secured for her a small bottle of pills, plastered with warnings, "Danger! Use strictly as directed! Do not operate a moving vehicle!"

The two lovers locked themselves in a friend's dormitory room and tossed the key out the window. They shared a bottle of wine, made love, and then took the sleeping pills and kissed each other goodbye. Half an hour later, they began to feel curious rumblings in their intestines. Soon they realized that Juliet's friend had given them laxatives, not sleeping potion!

There they were, locked in a small dorm room with the key ten floors below, and no toilets in sight!

The stench spread quickly throughout the building, alerting other residents. A security guard was summoned, who forced the lock and poked his face 'round the door. He quickly swung it shut, nearly overcome by the fumes. The unfortunate couple had to be rescued by the SWAT team, protected by gas masks. They were taken to the hospital and treated for severe dehydration.

It turned out that the friend at the pharmacy was alarmed by the request for sleeping pills with no prescription. She contacted the parents, who conferred with one another and realized that something had to be done. Thus, the outcome: the marriage was belayed, both students were suspended from college, and both sets of parents were relieved.


from the darwin awards website.
Image

I'm going to need a swat team, ready to mobilize, street maps covering the whole of florida, a pot of coffee, 12 jammy dodgers and A FEZ.
User avatar
bikkit
Member
 
Posts: 1815
Joined: Thu May 28, 2009 8:20 am
Location: Out of my mind- It's too dark and scary in there

Postby chris.ph » Fri Jun 19, 2009 5:10 pm

how the hell did you type that in three minutes it would have taken me an hour :shock:
measuring intelligence by exam results is like measuring digestion by turd length
User avatar
chris.ph
Member
 
Posts: 8678
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2008 11:52 am
Location: swansea south wales

Postby bikkit » Fri Jun 19, 2009 5:14 pm

I copied and pasted :oops:
Image

I'm going to need a swat team, ready to mobilize, street maps covering the whole of florida, a pot of coffee, 12 jammy dodgers and A FEZ.
User avatar
bikkit
Member
 
Posts: 1815
Joined: Thu May 28, 2009 8:20 am
Location: Out of my mind- It's too dark and scary in there

Postby chris.ph » Fri Jun 19, 2009 5:17 pm

cheat :lol:
measuring intelligence by exam results is like measuring digestion by turd length
User avatar
chris.ph
Member
 
Posts: 8678
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2008 11:52 am
Location: swansea south wales

Postby WannabeAngua » Fri Jun 19, 2009 7:37 pm

Well, I think this is one...
When we visited the UK last we were told that a puma was living on the moors somewhere in the country (can't remember where). :shock:
Apparently it had escaped form a zoo or something years ago, and now feeds on lambs and other livestock.
Surely this is an urban myth used to scare the tourists (aka us)??
There were no public health laws in Ankh-Morpork. It would be like installing smoke detectors in Hell.
- Feet of clay.
User avatar
WannabeAngua
Member
 
Posts: 928
Joined: Mon Dec 15, 2008 12:13 pm
Location: Norway

Postby Tonyblack » Fri Jun 19, 2009 7:44 pm

But, but, but... It's true!*





*Maybe :lol:
"Goodness is about what you do. Not what you pray to."
User avatar
Tonyblack
Moderator
 
Posts: 29022
Joined: Fri Jul 25, 2008 4:29 pm
Location: Cardiff, Wales

Postby Batty » Fri Jun 19, 2009 7:47 pm

I doubt it. There are a lot of sightings of puma's. There is even one around here, and a friend of mine whom I trust implicitly actually saw it one night.
Going to my school was an education in itself. Which is not to be confused with actually getting an education (Schultz)
User avatar
Batty
Member
 
Posts: 4656
Joined: Tue Feb 17, 2009 12:03 pm
Location: East Anglia

Postby chris.ph » Fri Jun 19, 2009 7:49 pm

the beast of bodmin :) how bigs your cat jan :?: you live around there dont you :lol: :lol:
measuring intelligence by exam results is like measuring digestion by turd length
User avatar
chris.ph
Member
 
Posts: 8678
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2008 11:52 am
Location: swansea south wales

Postby Who's Wee Dug » Fri Jun 19, 2009 8:58 pm

Well there is always the Loch Ness Monster :wink: being a Scot I am not entirely convinced until absolute scientific proof is produced, it is possible because that loch is so deep that there could be channels to other places. 8)
He willnae tak' a drink! I think he's deid! , on the other hand though A Midgie in yir hand is worth twa up yir kilt.
User avatar
Who's Wee Dug
Member
 
Posts: 14893
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2008 10:31 pm
Location: Stirlingshire, Scotland

Postby wolfiess » Sat Jun 20, 2009 3:44 am

i get enough exercise just pushing my luck
User avatar
wolfiess
Member
 
Posts: 89
Joined: Sun May 10, 2009 2:39 am
Location: glasgow

Postby wolfiess » Sat Jun 20, 2009 5:27 am

i get enough exercise just pushing my luck
User avatar
wolfiess
Member
 
Posts: 89
Joined: Sun May 10, 2009 2:39 am
Location: glasgow

Postby poohbcarrot » Sat Jun 20, 2009 6:06 am

Urban myths = Igorinas living in the big city :lol:
Image
"It's better to belong where you don't belong than not to belong where you used to belong,
remembering when you used to belong there"
-Sneebs
poohbcarrot
Member
 
Posts: 1557
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 4:15 pm
Location: Japan

Postby chris.ph » Sat Jun 20, 2009 6:58 am

ill put money on that theyve got a friend whos a primordial dwarf and they dressed him up for a laugh :)
measuring intelligence by exam results is like measuring digestion by turd length
User avatar
chris.ph
Member
 
Posts: 8678
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2008 11:52 am
Location: swansea south wales

Postby Jan Van Quirm » Sat Jun 20, 2009 1:08 pm

bugger! Just lost a post :evil:

Short version - Beast of Exmoor - Dartmoor - Bodmin moor - Yorkshire wild and windy Moors - *insert vast expanse of grotty grassland/heath* Moor (if they have free-roaming sheep/cattle anyway)

Pawprints - Pah! mostly in mud which is a highly UNreliable carrier as most people don't know big dogprints from big catprints and they squidge around in the mud anyway so the animal's not that big to start off with - have you seen the size of Chris's hound...? :P

The other type of spoor - How many people do you think are able to accurately identify Puma Poo...? Are there night classes in this somewhere?

:lol:

It's the aliens I'm telling ya! They love mutton!

Allegedly true zoo factoid
My Dad used to make signs for a Wildlife Park (Sparkwell/Dartmoor) and got friendly with some of the keepers who 'said' that they often found both types of spoor (and I'm assuming being keepers they could at least recognise Puma Poo by smell if not eyeballing... :roll: ) outside and a little way away from the compounds, usually when the females were on heat. But none of their pumas were missing...

I have an interesting theory about this - part of the Puma's mating customs involves poo-chucking? No? :lol: OK how about this one - they practise a very arcane form of erotic ventriloquism (only they 'throw' their pawprints not their voices...)

Of course what really happens is they simply jump the fence (it's amazing how high a body packed with athlete's muscles and claws like sickles can jump when they fancy a bit of nookie) and then, being cats and knowing a cushy billet when they find one, they jump back in come breakfast time... :lol:
Last edited by Jan Van Quirm on Mon Jun 22, 2009 10:18 am, edited 1 time in total.
"Some men see things as they are and ask why. Others dream things that never were and ask why not.” George Bernard Shaw
User avatar
Jan Van Quirm
Member
 
Posts: 10592
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2008 9:07 pm
Location: Dunheved, Kernow

Next

Return to The Broken Drum

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Yahoo [Bot] and 3 guests