JENKINS is the Chosen One!!!!!

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Postby Jan Van Quirm » Thu Dec 03, 2009 12:11 pm

*decides to humour him*

My oh my! I never would've guessed even though I missed seeing the Matrix piccy wherever you posted it*... :P

As for the Compo pics :roll: never would have got that clue (pooh? - compo? Fiendish! Fiendish!) :lol:

*oh that was what it was supposed to be! PMSL I thought you'd used something from a dodgy Japanese Action Man Boutique :lol:
"Some men see things as they are and ask why. Others dream things that never were and ask why not.” George Bernard Shaw
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Postby Dotsie » Thu Dec 03, 2009 3:13 pm

I am completely at a loss with this thread. Can someone explain what's going on for thickie Dotsie please? :oops:
What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass!
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Postby Jan Van Quirm » Thu Dec 03, 2009 5:28 pm

It's not supposed to make sense Dotsie so don't worry :wink: . It helps (a very little bit) if you've been following the load of old toot thread as well :P

Story so far (though this might be lacking in many respects)... Lord PS had been making salacious overtures to Tina over in the toot thread and Mortimer quite rightly was getting rather protective due LPS's mangle fixation and so Tina sought refuge in here... :roll: :lol:

... meanwhile, back in tootland, Jenkins was making wild assertions about being Mr Phelps from Mission Impossible and messing around with latex facemasks. Then J made some even wilder claims about Lord PS being involved in human trafficking of some Thai Lady-boys (Gary Glitter featured briefly, but that was probably just quantum) and then Tina chipped in over here with this fantastic claim about J being the Chosen One which is where the spurious Matrix stuff is coming from - Neo he isn't as he's more Arthriteus than Morpheus :twisted:

At that point I get rather fuzzy myself but I'm getting the strong impression that Mortimer, pooh and quite possibly Tina have a part-time job writing scripts for Eastenders (and don't bother turning up for script review meetings either)... :shock: :lol:
"Some men see things as they are and ask why. Others dream things that never were and ask why not.” George Bernard Shaw
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Postby poohcarrot » Thu Dec 03, 2009 9:49 pm

Vietnamese lady-boys. :lol:
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"You kicked a puppy," Lobsang said accusingly.
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Postby Jan Van Quirm » Thu Dec 03, 2009 10:16 pm

:lol: Whatever - don't ask me to keep up with the details as well :P
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Fri Dec 04, 2009 12:02 am

poohcarrot wrote:It was pretty obvious it was me all along. I wasn't trying to hide my identity. The Jenkins Matrix picture was obviously me. Lord Morty knew it was me too. :lol:


Lord Morty!.....Bah, he is one of the common folk, untitled you know and all that, seems like the bounder was not the cursed Jenkins chappie on this forum after all, I had my suspicion it was he who was the fellow Jenkns.
Now the finger points squarely on the paw print of Pooh being the mysterious intruder, but lets not rule out a few who have working knowledge of the forum just yet, as it would have to be cleared by one of the moderators for someone to have dual indentity, and that makes them a culprit if not the chappie to blame!.
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Fri Dec 04, 2009 12:08 am

Jan. a very good synopsis, which does yourself earn a week-end at the Ponsamby-Smyth estate, with the choice of spending the time with the kind Lord of the manor himself, where you will be bilited with maids and butlers to look after your every whim...or a chance to stay at the cottage in bottom field slumming it with Jenkins and his good wife and 5 brats.
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Postby poohcarrot » Fri Dec 04, 2009 12:52 am

Lord Ponsamby-Smyth wrote:Jan. a very good synopsis, which does yourself earn a week-end at the Ponsamby-Smyth estate, with the choice of spending the time with the kind Lord of the manor himself,


...and if you go, you'd better watch your back. He's a Vietnamese Lady-boy killer!! :shock:
"Disliking Carrot would be like kicking a puppy."
"You kicked a puppy," Lobsang said accusingly.
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Fri Dec 04, 2009 1:14 am

On one of the fields, we have a small area of the children of the local village to take some intrest in farming, and one of the sections is the pig farming.

Here we have a few pot bellied vietnamese pigs, and unfortunately, one of them, a vietnamese pot bellied lady pig was accidently ran over by a tractor I was a passenger on, which had managed to escape from the pen, sadly this was reported as a tragic accident in the local paper, and for some reason, some larger journal made a mistake in the printing, and awarded myself £250.000 compensation, for the distress it caused when they wrongly quoted me of being in some Vietnamese lady-boy killing, which was in fact a P.B Vietnamese pig as I have explained.

Any further comments of this nature, will of course now have to be sent in to the moderators for gaining their permission, as I think that once and for all the news of the Vietnemese etc, has been cleared up.
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Fri Dec 04, 2009 1:18 am

Though come to think of it, the publicity will not do me, or the financial side of the estate, any harm whatsoever, so please do spread the word of my secret nature.

I think Pooh you could become a good PR chappie for the estate... :wink:
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Postby Tina a.k.a.SusanSto.Helit » Fri Dec 04, 2009 2:26 am

Jan Van Quirm wrote:and then Tina chipped in over here with this fantastic claim about J being the Chosen One which is where the spurious Matrix stuff is coming from - Neo he isn't as he's more Arthriteus than Morpheus :twisted:

At that point I get rather fuzzy myself but I'm getting the strong impression that Mortimer, pooh and quite possibly Tina have a part-time job writing scripts for Eastenders (and don't bother turning up for script review meetings either)... :shock: :lol:


But ... buh, buh, but, Jenkins is the 888th member to the forum... *starts swooning again, and then slaps herself soundly* Ouch, 'ere now you don't have to do that. Yes, I do! You are NOT acting like a proper married woman now ... *Starts the Tappin' 'o' the Toes ... realizes she is arguing with herself... **takes a pill and has a lie down** * :oops:

I has a screenshot... :wink:
Aha! So, Bob's yer uncle... very clever.
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Fri Dec 04, 2009 10:33 am

Tina a.k.a.SusanSto.Helit wrote:
You are NOT acting like a proper married woman now ...

I has a screenshot... :wink:


A married woman, is not a role or a position, that someone has to be, you are holding back the real you if you continue in this vein of trying to be someone that society says you must be.

Take a tip please Tina, a week-end away from the normal riggours of your life will do you the world of good, and here at Ponsomby-Smyth estate, we can teach you to be whole again, and not like someone who has a role to play in society, the Stepford wives do not need another member.

And of course you can watch the real Jenkins from afar, as we look out on the country estate and take in the fresh air just you and I, and enjoy the quiet chat and tenderness of each other.
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Postby poohcarrot » Fri Dec 04, 2009 11:09 am

Blimey! He's trying to bump Tina off now! :shock:
"Disliking Carrot would be like kicking a puppy."
"You kicked a puppy," Lobsang said accusingly.
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Fri Dec 04, 2009 5:26 pm

poohcarrot wrote:Blimey! He's trying to bump Tina off now! :shock:


Mortimer Postlethwaite came close to the truth a few days ago, his silence seems to have gone unnoticed....he he he.

The wenches on the mangles know the real truth, and they are not able to say much...ho ho ho.

The stones, its all in the stones....ha ha ha.
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Postby Tina a.k.a.SusanSto.Helit » Fri Dec 04, 2009 8:18 pm

poohcarrot wrote:Blimey! He's trying to bump Tina off now! :shock:


*SQWARKS AGAIN!!!!!* * finds a better hiding place... and her families coveted Ninja Assassin sword for protection, cuts herself and looks for a bandage :roll: *
Aha! So, Bob's yer uncle... very clever.
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