JENKINS is the Chosen One!!!!!

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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Fri Dec 04, 2009 9:10 pm

Tina a.k.a.SusanSto.Helit wrote:
poohcarrot wrote:Blimey! He's trying to bump Tina off now! :shock:


*SQWARKS AGAIN!!!!!* * finds a better hiding place... and her families coveted Ninja Assassin sword for protection, cuts herself and looks for a bandage :roll: *


Tina, why fight against this, you can tell that the forces of nature are trying tio bring us together, as your mishap with the sword merely indicates.

Surely it would be better to accept the fate and stay awhile in the Manor house, and watch as the wenches work the mangle with me, than put your life at risk in some absurd way of trying to fight what the path before us has laid down.

And stop your Sqwaking
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Postby Tina a.k.a.SusanSto.Helit » Fri Dec 04, 2009 11:27 pm

Lord Ponsamby-Smyth wrote:
Tina a.k.a.SusanSto.Helit wrote:
poohcarrot wrote:Blimey! He's trying to bump Tina off now! :shock:


*SQWARKS AGAIN!!!!!* * finds a better hiding place... and her families coveted Ninja Assassin sword for protection, cuts herself and looks for a bandage :roll: *


Tina, why fight against this, you can tell that the forces of nature are trying tio bring us together, as your mishap with the sword merely indicates.

Surely it would be better to accept the fate and stay awhile in the Manor house, and watch as the wenches work the mangle with me, than put your life at risk in some absurd way of trying to fight what the path before us has laid down.

And stop your Sqwaking


*SQWARKS AGAIN!!!!!* Have at you, you Bounder, Cad, and RAKE! Nevah, I am repulsed by your vain and egotistical attempts at seduction. * Turns her back on the Bounder, Cad, and RAKE! Leaves the thread with her head held high!! *
Aha! So, Bob's yer uncle... very clever.
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Postby poohcarrot » Fri Dec 04, 2009 11:45 pm

You know Tina, I had absolutely no idea what you were squawking about at first. :?

Only when you explained that Jenkins was forum member 888 :idea: did any of it make sense. :lol:
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Sat Dec 05, 2009 12:21 am

Ahhhh I love the thrill of the chase, and of trying to seduce a woman who plays hard to get, I can see it all in the post by Tina, she is merely turning her back and then standing still hoping that I say something to appease her, and to value her individuality as a person in her own right.

The Sqwaking has become a mating call to her nature, and this has increased my desire to get to know the woman better, and I shall ( if the good doctor pardens the pun) leave no stone unturned, in my quest to show the lady a softer side of Lord Ponsamby-Smyth, despite what Jenkins may say, and so win over some of fair ladys good hand in friendship.
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Postby Tina a.k.a.SusanSto.Helit » Sat Dec 05, 2009 12:44 am

poohcarrot wrote:You know Tina, I had absolutely no idea what you were squawking about at first. :?

Only when you explained that Jenkins was forum member 888 :idea: did any of it make sense. :lol:


* Peeks back in unable to look away from the Train Wreck of ewwwww!!! Attempted seduction, ... and sees her HERO the Octo-Dood!! Hides behind his Octarine Shield for comfort and protection. *

*note to Jan... men can be soooooooo dense*
Aha! So, Bob's yer uncle... very clever.
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Sat Dec 05, 2009 1:02 am

Ah yes, I knew the lady would be unable to resist the look back, to see if I was looking back at her.

Even the Octarine Shield could not hide her true feelings as she wondered where the real hero was, anyone could play the game of Jenkins, and assume they were the chosen one, but only someone who was dashing and took the moment for what it was, is able to break down the veneer of courtship for what it really was.

And yet, the heart in the chest of Lord Ponsamby-Smyth did in fact skip a beat, when he realised that the mere wenches at the mangle station, were not enough for him.
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Postby Dotsie » Sat Dec 05, 2009 10:15 am

Tina a.k.a.SusanSto.Helit wrote:
poohcarrot wrote:You know Tina, I had absolutely no idea what you were squawking about at first. :?

Only when you explained that Jenkins was forum member 888 :idea: did any of it make sense. :lol:


* Peeks back in unable to look away from the Train Wreck of ewwwww!!! Attempted seduction, ... and sees her HERO the Octo-Dood!! Hides behind his Octarine Shield for comfort and protection. *

*note to Jan... men can be soooooooo dense*

Honestly Tina, I'd be surprised if anyone got that :lol:
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Postby Jan Van Quirm » Sat Dec 05, 2009 12:28 pm

:lol:
"Some men see things as they are and ask why. Others dream things that never were and ask why not.” George Bernard Shaw
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Sat Dec 05, 2009 2:08 pm

Quinn method might be acceptable, but first you would need to take the truth serum.

And we all know what liars we chaps are!...lol.

I'd like to applaud all those involved in the removal of myself from society, into this god forsaken building, where I shall remain incarsarated for many years for a crime I did not commit, I was advised to plead mercy and throw myself upon the courts for a leaner sentance, thats why I agreed to go against the truth and plead guilty.

Some folk will see this as a result, and will dance at the news, the same way as those who attended a hanging or beheading in earlier days, but if the cry of freedom which was shouted by my fellow Scotsman, then I am in good company, and am proud to show that I did not warrent such a fate to befall me.

Freedom for the innocent one
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Mon Dec 07, 2009 1:41 am

As luck would have it, im sharing a cell with some guy who is watching me constantly, and saying very little, which is a little disconcerting to me.

I have made a few friends, well aquantences I should say, and have been introduced to Bernie " The blowlamp" Montgomery whom I had heard about, though I didnt give him a light.

As reported, im spending a few hours each day in the laundry, and have not succombed to the theft of the washing powder, as the wardens do tend to keep a close eye on new inmates, for fear that they do something like trying to take their own life, but though im trying to adjust, the life swap im going through is horrendous, and the thoughts that spin round my head do make me squirm at times, but greater innocent folk than me have endured such treatment wrongly, and the thought "what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger", makes me want to do a couple of hours each day in the gym.

VO is on the way out to you Mortimer....
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Postby Morty » Mon Dec 07, 2009 8:07 am

Thank you kind Sir,
It will be nice to nice to rekindle my friendship with Bernie the Image Montgomery.

He was always one of the lads and you could always depend on Bernie to get things going. Bernie was full of life, he had spirit in his soul and fire in his eyes. It’s just a shame that so often the spirit and fire did so much damage :oops:

Please let him know I’m coming to see him soon. Bernie will have been desperately disappointed to have missed the Guy Fawkes celebrations this year. For Bernie it was Christmas and his Birthday all rolled into one. For the Fire Brigade all their worst nightmares at once but that’s water under the bridge :oops:

Bernie will be a good friend to you until SOME MORE MEMBERS SIGN YOUR PETITION and we can get you released.

My advice would be to keep in with Bernie. It’s a closely guarded secret that during another stretch Bernie served at Slade open prison he was manipulated by a cunning inmate known As Fletcher. It seems that one night Fletch filled Bernie’s head with fire when Fletch recalled the night of the London Blitz. The very same night fire broke out at Slade prison and 20 inmates disappeared never to be recaptured.

If your petition is ignored then don’t give up hope. Bernie always said there was nothing he couldn’t torch and particularly at this time of year Bernie does enjoy the odd Flaming Sambuca or three and can’t resist the invitation to light the Christmas Pud.

I am sure that Bernie will be home for Christmas.....As I said Your Lordship keep close to Bernie. Nudge Nudge Wink Wink say no More :lol: :lol:
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Postby Lord Ponsamby-Smyth » Mon Dec 07, 2009 3:10 pm

I was talking to Bernie this morning, and he said he had been asked to turn the prison christmas lights on this year....

Health and Safety bods are trying to prevent it happening, but Bernie aint going to be put off, even if it meant a flame war he said.
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Postby Morty » Mon Dec 07, 2009 3:30 pm

Lord Ponsamby-Smyth wrote:I was talking to Bernie this morning, and he said he had been asked to turn the prison christmas lights on this year....

Health and Safety bods are trying to prevent it happening, but Bernie aint going to be put off, even if it meant a flame war he said.


Bernie and I have both just ruined a pair of Marks and Sparks ''Z'' Fronts.
Don't mention the ''Z'' fronts we both have a medical problem :oops:
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